Tuesday, August 16, 2011
My initial perceptions of a relationship was highly based on my inquisitive questioning of teenage mates and the media portrayal of how the typical couple behaves. How, in privacy, two persons enjoy fully the company of each other. How, in trust, two persons share from the deepest of secrets to the minutest of daily ramblings. How, in intimacy, two persons fulfill the very human desire of physical touch.
Of course that's television material and is oft flawed when we compare it to reality. But we wish our other half could replicate the characteristics and doings that are considered the norm of the boyfriend/girlfriend. To a certain extent, we can't escape what is expected of each gender. For instance, the male should appear to be chivalrous - opening doors, giving her walks home, being a butler of some sorts - it's an unspoken rule. The guys are also 'forced' to understand and tolerate of their partner's monthly hormonal tantrums. And let's not forgetting the heaviest of responsibilities: how, traditionally, the male must be capable enough to protect one's daughter, and consequently sustain a household.
It seems the society have placed so much focus on how females are the more emotional being; whereas the male reflects insignificant (or none, at all) emotion to even be taken into consideration.
The cause of breakups falls back to this main reason: The lack of commitment. Without full knowledge of the future (or the present), one can never be confident enough to commit. They failed to foresee the heavy responsibilities that lies ahead of them. Therefore, when the going gets tough, all things break loose.
6 months ago, I haven't the slightest clue of where I would have been now. Admittedly, in January I was deep in desperation to find a suitable partner to accomplish the three aforementioned things of what I'd consider a perfect relationship; the wishful kind where we label ourselves 'in a relationship' without having any strings attached.
Along the way in these 6 months, I've learnt when you fall in love with one person, you don't just fall in love with the person itself, but you're falling in love with how she nags at you whenever you're out for training, her insecurities of you having eyes on another girl, her awkward scar from a mole removal that she pulls off ever so well, her wondrous talents that leaves you doubtful of what your capabilities are, her family and lifestyle that differs massively from yours, her depressive tweets appearing in your timeline, her playful and childish nature that she reveals only to you. And despite all these, you'll continually give the effort the keep the fire burning knowing that you're not alone.
Loving never comes easy. Even the strongest of couples you see on the surface can end in a break up. Who would've known why?
It's either you love with all your might, or you don't love at all.